


pulling me back in (to serenity)

by cyjchillmyg



Category: GOT7, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Idols, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Green Tea - Freeform, Jackson Needs a Hug, M/M, Park Gae, Wang Gae, jinson, jinyoung wants to hug him, mark and jaebeom are tired parents, the maknaes are the only sane ones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-06
Updated: 2019-04-06
Packaged: 2020-01-05 16:24:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18369704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyjchillmyg/pseuds/cyjchillmyg
Summary: Them fighting was nothing new but it was about to become a record when it had easily escalated from their bickering to loud arguments to full on fighting- neither shy to throw a punch yet neither had actually landed one on the other.----------------------------------------------------------------------------------or Jackson doesn't know how to look after himself and Jinyoung doesn't know how to help





	pulling me back in (to serenity)

**Author's Note:**

> Helloo!! This is my very first work and oml i'm so nervous. I mainly write jinson - so dw, my jinson stans, there's more coming!!
> 
> Enjoy and let me know what you think in the comments!!

Mark was doing yoga with his boyfriend, Jaebeom. Or rather, Jaebeom was doing the actual exercise while Mark made comments while playing a video game, sitting cross-legged on the floor next to Jaebeom's mat.   
  
The group had two days off after having a very packed schedule. They would be out of the house by 5 am and only returning at 1 am the next day. The past week and a bit had been filled with all seven of them on the same schedule- this four-hour sleep schedule that they all hated. It had been a long while since all seven were on such a heavy schedule but JYP had decided that the group had too many individual schedules and decided to throw them back into teamwork with torture. It had been a particularly long week for both Mark and Jaebeom with their best friends fighting which had set an uneasy feeling among the rest.   
  
"Just like that," Mark now huffed as he sent a blue shell out onto the track.   
  
"You're not even looking at me," Jaebeom huffed back.   
  
"Jae, focus on keeping your legs straight!"   
  
Jaebeom was about to kick the boy he'd been glaring at when a knock distracted both of them. Mark paused his game while Jaebeom dropped flat on the floor.   
  
"Did Yugyeom forget his keys?" Mark looked at Jaebeom who had regained enough strength to push himself off the floor.   
  
He was walking to the door, Mark's eyes following him, when he replied, "No. In fact, he said something about spending the night with Bam. Maybe Jackson didn't open the door to Jinyoung?"   
  
"Oh," was Mark's only response as Jaebeom twisted the door opened.   
  
Jackson and Jinyoung had been fighting for almost a week now, with Jackson ignoring the younger and no explanation was given to their elders. Them fighting was nothing new but it was about to become a record when it had easily escalated from their bickering to loud arguments to full on fighting- neither shy to throw a punch yet neither had actually landed one on the other. What was even worse was the fact that the two couldn't even hide it well enough during the group's shared schedules which created this weird tension between the everyone since the arguing couple didn't want to be near each other at all- often leaving the room to avoid one another. This had left the other five unsure about who to hang out with.   
  
BamBam was sure that Jackson and Jinyoung fighting was bad, like real bad. And he wasn't the only one who thought so. At first, Mark was sure that the two would be able to act like the adults they are and sort it out but boy, was he wrong. Jaebeom was the one who commented about how wrong Mark was, having then told Mark about Jinyoung's silent complaints about his boyfriend, Jackson.   
  
While Yugyeom had taken it upon himself to discuss the issue with the other maknaes, making them wonder further about what they could be fighting about. BamBam was the first to say he hadn't gone out for meat with Jackson in forever for that to be a new issue but Youngjae had wondered if it was linked to something about Jackson's health and if he was even eating at all as the boy struggled to remember when he last Jackson eat and having recalled Jinyoung making a comment to him about how green tea really wasn't that healthy to override a good night's sleep and full meals. Once Youngjae relayed this conversation to the other two, they couldn't see any other cause.   
  
"It just makes sense!" Yugyeom clapped his hand against the table, making Youngjae jump.   
  
"Hmm, he isn't wrong. Jackson hasn't been eating much..." BamBam tapped his chin in thought.   
  
"And his schedule has been absolutely manic. He keeps flying back and forth from Hong Kong to Seoul!" Youngjae chimed in.   
  
"That explains Jinyoung sleeping at weird hours for the past few weeks,'" The youngest added, "I knew he was talking to Jackson at night but what if their arguing started long before we noticed?"   
  
Yugyeom's brows had furrowed at the thought of his two loved hyungs fighting without sharing it with any one of them.   
  
_ Did Mark hyung and Jaebeom hyung even know? _ Yugyeom sighed, exasperated.   
  
BamBam noticed Yugyeom's mind running marathons as while as Youngjae chewing his bottom lip, looking lost. BamBam was worried, confused, hurt and just as lost as to how he could help them.   
  
Each of them loved Jackson cracking jokes and making them laugh as the four of them stuffed their faces, not caring about diets and idol requirements. Jackson helped the younger ones have that break, that reminder that they should be relaxing and looking after themselves. While Jinyoung literally looked after them. Yeah, he threatened them- and fulfilled these threats more often than they'd liked to admit- but he always made sure they had food, they had enough sleep. Jinyoung was sure that their water bottles were never empty during a fan sign or rehearsal. The two had cared for them three in a way that they knew they had to help the two overcome this argument.   
  
"We need to talk to Mark hyung and Jaebeom hyung." Youngjae suddenly spoke, breaking the silence that had settled over them.   
  
And that's how Jaebeom opened the door to see Youngjae standing there, a bag in hand and a nervous smile on his face.   
  
"Youngjae...?" Jaebeom had trailed off, his muscles starting to ache from the yoga and his brain starting to wonder why on earth were people coming back to the dorm when they had literally moved out. But he didn't show any bitterness towards the younger from disrupting his relaxing and peaceful (read no other members present aside from Mark) day off.   
  
"Hi, hyung!" Youngjae smiled, a little more relaxed than originally.   
  
"What's going on?" Jaebeom asked as the younger has wandered in to find Mark in the living room who was looking at them passively.   
  
"What's in the bag?" Mark asked Youngjae.   
  
Youngjae decided that answering Mark's question was easier than Jaebeom's so he shook the bag a little before pulling out a bottle of wine.   
  
"BamBam said we were having a nice evening between us all." Youngjae smiled his sweet smile, hoping that BamBam and Yugyeom were right about the oldest two having a soft spot for him.   
  
Mark's eyes zoomed in on the bottle while Jaebeom had taken the rest of the bag from Youngjae.   
  
Jaebeom clicked his tongue and said, "Why did you buy so much? We're not gonna need three bottles of wine, eight bottles of soju and beer."   
  
At this, Mark raised an eyebrow. Youngjae couldn't do it anymore- he just had to tell them!   
  
"Me, Bam and Yugyeom decided to tell Jackson hyung that we're having a Japanese album discussion at the dorm so he doesn't hang out with Bam and has to go to his apartment, or the gym, or wherever he goes. But we didn't tell Jinyoung hyung so that he'd go over to Jackson hyung and they can finally clear the air." Youngjae rushed out in one breath.   
  
Once he was done, he reached into the bag Jaebeom was now holding, took a beer can and started drinking as he plopped onto the sofa that Mark was leaning on.   
  
"I told you they noticed it!" Mark hissed at Jaebeom who was still staring at Youngjae like he couldn't believe the plan.   
  
"How do you even know Jinyoung will go to Jackson?" Jaebeom asked, pointing out the first flaw in the maknaes' plan.   
  
"Jae, where else is he gonna go?" Mark answered instead of Youngjae and Youngjae smiled at Mark.   
  
Jaebeom sighed and placed the bag on the table, muttering a simple "true" as he went to grab a wine glass.   
  
When he came back, he asked Youngjae when the others were arriving. Youngjae said that they'd be here as soon as they'd convinced Jackson to not head out. The three of them settled into a soft silence as Youngjae soon joined Mark in his video game and Jaebeom sat on the couch with Mark leaning into his legs.   
  
This soft silence was only ruined by two idiots yelling "EASY!" as they walked into the dorm.   
  
"Hyungs, we did it!" Yugyeom giggled.   
  
"It was so," Bam paused to make eye contact with Yugyeom before finishing, "EASY!"   
  
"Oh, my," Jaebeom sighed as he eyed the two who now finally sat down and joined the others, at a calmer state than usual which was hard to tell since their calm was still very energetic.   
  
"What did Jackson say?" Mark asked the two.   
  
BamBam answered, "When he picked up, he was quiet. We told him about the talk and suggested he should take the opportunity to have a quiet night in at his apartment and- this is the weirdest part- he just agreed, like without even giving any reasons."   
  
"Yeah, he didn't even say bye when he hung up. It was almost like he wanted to stay at home and do nothing," Yugyeom added. "But then he asked about Jinyoung hyung. Did he come back to the dorm at all today?"   
  
"No," Jaebeom answered, "I haven't seen him at all today..."   
  
With that, they all sighed and hoped that the two would make up.   
  
They all knew Jinyoung wouldn't sleep in, even after such a sleepless week. So, of course, none of them saw him that morning as he left the house at 6 am. What they didn't know was that Jinyoung had actually skipped the gym that morning and had gone straight to this café/bookstore that occupied the parallel road to Han River.   
  
Jinyoung looked out the window that was sat next to him in his booth. He sighed, heavily.   
  
This café/bookstore was his little escape from his everyday life when it all got too much. The comfort that he found in the smell of paper and coffee was one that he only found in one other place. Or rather, person.   
  
As Jackson clouded his thoughts for the nth time that day, Jinyoung sighed even heavier than before- if possible. He just didn't get why Jackson was so mad at him for trying to look after him.

  
Jinyoung had noticed two weeks ago that something was up with Jackson straight away. He had stayed up, later than his body wanted to as he spent the day in dance rehearsals. He knew Jackson had a late finish in Hong Kong that day so it was no question that he was going to stay up. His muscles just had to wait until his heart was comforted. He knew Jackson's habits of skipping meals, using green tea as a suitable replacement. He knew that his boyfriend would stay up later once they hung up the phone. He knew that the other would go over his schedule for tomorrow, maybe work a bit more on this song or try to practice the routine a bit more. Jinyoung knows Jackson and that was how he was able to tell something was wrong.   
  
Jackson had wanted to drop the notion that something was wrong just as Jinyoung had thought. But he also knew that in just a couple of days, the boy would be back in Seoul to rest and he could question him face to face. Only that was thrown out the window with JYP suddenly giving them the most hated schedule ever. He didn't even get to greet Jackson properly from his flight even though they had been bickering over Jackson's lack of care and Jinyoung's excessive worrying. It wasn't until after a dance rehearsal that Jackson had snapped him, the first escalation.   
  
"Seriously, Jinyoung, I didn't know I was dating my mother. Will you just back off?" Jackson snarled at him as Jinyoung had slid to sit next to him to ask if he's been eating ok, sleeping enough.   
  
While Jinyoung knew that he was very motherly like, (he had made jokes himself before) there was something in Jackson's tone that had him flinching and walking away from him. Jinyoung didn't speak to him the rest of the day and it didn't seem to bother Jackson at all. That hurt Jinyoung even more.   
  
The second escalation was when Jackson had asked him a question the next day as if nothing had happened. Jinyoung was mad that Jackson hasn't apologised and was upset that Jackson didn't even acknowledge what had happened. The question Jackson asked fairly simple, "are you going to the gym today, Jinyoungie?". But Jinyoung refused to give into the nickname and had answered bitterly "why do you care?" before walking off to try to calm down before he punched a wall. He only briefly saw the irritation and slight hurt that Jackson's eyes held when he walked back in. But Jackson hasn't made a move to amend things even after they finished for the day. The next couple of days were filled with sarcastic comments and threats of physical violence. Neither had actually thrown a punch but they saw how the other members were flinching. The rest of the week consisted of them leaving the room when the other was present. They noticed the hesitations growing among the rest of the members as the couple's argument only down spiralled.   
  
So, now they were both ignoring each other. Too hurt to move on, too angry to forgive and too prideful to apologise first. This was when their similarities were enhanced over their differences.    
  
Yet Jinyoung still didn't get why Jackson was mad at him for looking after his boyfriend. It made no fucking sense.   
  
So, he stayed in that café/bookstore all day, drinking too much coffee and eating too much cake as he slacked off everything in his routine. Which, on a Saturday, had included movie nights with Jackson at his apartment. There'd be popcorn that would end up being used to throw at each other, blankets that would be too much for Jackson but not enough for Jinyoung. And there'd be soft cuddles. The kind that Jinyoung loved. The ones that weren't exaggerated like the ones Jackson would do in front of cameras. The ones that held Jinyoung so close to Jackson, so close he could hear his heartbeat beat so rapidly. Jinyoung was worried when they first started to officially date - was Jackson that nervous? Jackson had told him that Jinyoung always did that to his heart, even if he just smiled across the room from him. Jinyoung made Jackson's heartbeat crazy and Jinyoung knew that Jackson knew he did the same to Jinyoung. The kind of cuddles that had both of them feeling safe, comforted and secure.   
  
Jinyoung almost stabbed the plate as he took his next bite of cake, tears burning his eyes but he refused to let them fall. It was 5:15 pm and the only thing he'd eaten was cake and coffee all day, he was starting to feel sick of it. He paid the bill and left a nice tip as a silent thank you for letting him sit there all day.   
  
Jackson's apartment was closer to this then the dorm and Jinyoung wondered if he should just do it. Just go over and have it out with Jackson. No more running and no more sulking.   
  
The wind hit his face and he felt a sudden rise of confidence- his pride dropping in response. But Jinyoung didn't care, he cared for Jackson. He wanted to hold him and be held by him, to whisper sweet things to each other and tell him how sorry he was for overstepping. With that in mind, Jinyoung stormed over to Jackson's apartment as fast as he could.   
  
He walked into the building, nodding at the receptionist that recognised him and waited for the elevator to arrive. Once it was there, he stepped in and pressed the 9th-floor button as many times as he could to speed up the doors closing. He knew he didn't affect their speed at all but he was eager. Once on Jackson's floor, he stilled outside the door. The number 22 staring at him. Jackson had teased him saying he got the 9th floor and number 22 just so he could remember Jinyoung's birthday. Jinyoung had gotten flustered that he pushed Jackson away from him. Oh, how he had really wanted to just bury his head into his neck while Jackson rubbed circles onto his back while softly chuckling at him instead. He wanted them to do that now.   
  
_ Just knock, Jinyoung. Just fucking do it, you fool. _   
  
Just as Jinyoung raised his hand, the door had swung backwards. Jackson squinted at Jinyoung before biting his lip and stepping back into his apartment. Jinyoung followed, close behind as he shut the door behind him and took off his shoes. He slid into the slippers Jackson had for him and hung his coat in the spare hook Jackson kept clear for him. Jinyoung's heart clenched as he remembered the blush that had worked its way up both their necks into their faces as Jackson stuttered to inform Jinyoung of these new adjustments just for him.   
  
Jinyoung wandered into the living room where he saw Jackson sitting on the couch, leaning back with his head resting on the top with a cushion underneath, eyes closed but that didn't mean Jinyoung didn't see the quick movements underneath the lids. Jackson was tired, he most likely had a major migraine and had likely spent the whole day in bed until now. Jinyoung moved to sit next to him, saying nothing as he rested his right hand atop Jackson's hand that was resting on his thigh. He held Jackson's hand and had started rubbing circles with the back of his thumb when Jackson squeezed his hand. This probably meant nothing to any other person but for these two, they had just forgiven each other with no words spoken. But that didn't mean no words were not going to be spoken at all.   
  
Jinyoung sighed as he leaned back, half his back atop Jackson's chest as the latter used their entwined hands to pull Jinyoung's thigh over his own. At this angle, Jinyoung had his head between the older's shoulder and chest, resting softly.   
  
"Is it a bad one?" Jinyoung whispered in regards to Jackson's migraine.   
  
Jackson smiled softly and lifted his head to look at the top of Jinyoung's. He really loves this boy.   
  
"Doesn't hurt as much anymore," Jackson answered vaguely as he pressed a soft kiss onto Jinyoung's head, squeezing their hands into Jinyoung's thigh that rested atop his own.   
  
"Are you talking about your head or your heart?" Jinyoung whispered again, his eyes falling shut as he felt Jackson's lips through his hair.   
  
"Were you talking about the argument or my head?" Jackson teased back, his smile growing.   
  
Jinyoung squeezed their hands and Jackson didn't miss the way his eyebrows furrowed.   
  
"Both." He heard as he was raising a hand to massage the frown in his boyfriend's brows.   
  
"Same," Jackson exhaled heavily, his hand moving from the brows to the dark hair that sat there. "But we both fucked up for it to get to this stage."   
  
"Definitely. We are idiots."   
  
Jackson knew what Jinyoung was questioning in his head so he answered out loud for him.   
  
"I'm sorry I snapped at you over the phone at first and then that day at dance rehearsal. It's just," Jackson took a shaky breath, "It's just that when I was back home, it was so busy that I didn't have a minute to myself. And I know it's kinda my fault for choosing to fill my schedule as such but I had to do all the shows and interviews. Plus, there was the music video, the studio and a bunch of other stuff to do. My mum kept begging me to visit so I did but then she complained that I've lost weight, that the bags under my eyes are so bad and that I've not been looking after myself. And I was just like, I haven't had to chance to tell my boyfriend I love him let alone to shit-"   
  
"Oh my goodness, Sseunie!" Jinyoung whined as his face grew hot and he tried to bury his head into Jackson. Jackson, on the other hand, laughed and let go of his hand to pull Jinyoung into him.   
  
"What, you know about my bowel movements." He teased Jinyoung, knowing that the younger was blushing due to him saying I love you rather than him being open over his bowel movements- even if the younger wouldn't admit it. Jackson loved how Jinyoung still reacted as if every time they said I love you was their first time.   
  
"Oh my- just continue you, will you?" Jinyoung flicked Jackson's chest with his left hand while the hand that been left alone by Jackson's had sneaked its way to Jackson's back.   
  
"Right. So, where was I? Ah yes, I was so busy and as cheesy as this sounds, I needed to see you. Not talk to you like we do. I needed you in my arms, physically. I don't know what it was because it's never been this bad in the two years we've been dating. And I guess I was stressed about everything else as well as trying to figure out why I needed you so badly. That's why I snapped at you that night over the phone. I hated how you knew something wasn't right and there was no point saying that I miss you cos the whole world knows that."   
  
Jackson didn't know when exactly the hear from Jinyoung's hand had started to move in circles on his back. But he appreciated it as he knew it was the younger's way of showing him that he was listening to every word he uttered.   
  
"I haven't been eating, I haven't even been drinking my green tea properly. And I hated how you knew just by looking at me. Because I can't lie to you and say otherwise. You know that, right?" Jackson squeezed the thigh that was over his as he felt Jinyoung nod.   
  
With a heavy sigh, he continued. "I'm sorry I was an idiot. I'm sorry I called you my mum and I'm sorry I didn't say sorry then. I'm sorry, Jinyoung."   
  
Jackson kissed the Jinyoung's head again and he let the man, that was half on him and half next to him, adjust him. Jinyoung swung both legs over Jackson's lap and twisted his body so he was lying across the sofa, grabbing a couple of cushions to place under his head that was resting on the couch arm so he could see Jackson clearer.   
  
Jackson was looking at Jinyoung, his hands massaging the latter's legs. Jinyoung reached towards the hand that was closer to his own and grabbed it. He took a deep breath and then he spoke.   
  
"I'm sorry I snapped back at you. I'm sorry I didn't understand that and that I couldn't help you when you needed me to. I'm sorry for being selfish and thinking you just didn't want to tell me and thought I was getting clingy and annoying. I'm sorry that I went from caring about your health- about you- to getting emotional over nothing. I'm sorry, Jackson."   
  
Jinyoung had said it all in one breath and with his eyes screwed shut. Being vulnerable was something Jinyoung could get over when he was with Jackson but he could never get over the heavy gaze Jackson always gave him. He could feel it right now, just these two eyes, that held all the magic in the universe, focusing on him. Two eyes that weren't judging but were listening, understanding the reasons with such care.   
  
Jackson squeezed Jinyoung's hand, knowing how hard it is for Jinyoung to put his emotions into words. It was almost as hard for Jackson to say the truth about his health.   
  
Jackson grabbed Jinyoung's waist with his other hand and twisted the lying boy to make room for himself to lie next to him. Jinyoung shuffled around, allowing himself to be moved and space to be made for Jackson. The couch wasn't small but it wasn't the biggest of spaces. So that's how Jackson ended up koala hugging Jinyoung, one leg over Jinyoung's long legs, one arm under his head and another arm around his torso. They were facing each other, foreheads touching and Jinyoung had his arms around Jackson's chest, hugging the boy closer.   
  
The two had missed each other in the short week they had been fighting. Both had let their stubbornness and anger act with no filter. Yet these boys have had worse times and these were only worse because they couldn't pick up on the small gestures. It was gestures that the couple relied on, both struggle to express their own emotions with words so used a soft touch to provide the comfort they had sought with searching eyes. They stayed in silence and Jackson's eyes had closed long ago, Jinyoung was sure that his head was hurting a lot more than he let on.   
  
"Jackson," He whispered, shifting slightly to see if the older had fallen asleep.   
  
The hand on his torso made its way to his waist where the grip pulled on Jinyoung to stop moving. Jinyoung studied Jackson's face, there was a slight crease between his eyebrows and his jaw was clenched as he knew Jackson was grinding his teeth again. He brought a hand to Jackson's face, smoothing out the crease and then holding his jaw until it relaxed.   
  
"We should order some food so you can take painkillers and sleep," Jinyoung muttered, leaning towards the older to place a delicate kiss on Jackson's cheek.   
  
"I know," Jackson mumbled back as he moved his head into Jinyoung's neck as Jinyoung's hand moved towards the back of Jackson's neck. "Just give me a few more minutes."   
  
Jinyoung smiled and hugged the boy closer with the hand on the older's neck moving to gently massage the back of Jackson's head. He felt Jackson relaxed even more as the boy snuggled further into Jinyoung. Just then, a loud chiming interrupted them.   
  
Jackson groaned as Jinyoung opened his arms to let Jackson grab his phone and answer. Jackson leaned over Jinyoung to grab his phone off the coffee table. He saw it was BamBam calling and sighed as he answered it.   
  
"Yeah, Bam?" He shuffled back into the space between Jinyoung and the couch, while Jinyoung wrapped an arm around his back.   
  
"Hyung! Hello! I just wanted to let you know-" BamBam had started to ramble down the phone. He wasn't exactly quiet but Jinyoung still shuffled closer to listen better.   
  
"Don't say it like that, make it sound like it's gonna be long as fuck. " A voice cut BamBam off.   
  
Jinyoung frowned while Jackson spoke both their thoughts, "Yugyeom, don't swear!"   
  
"Shit, he heard you. Way to go, Yug!' BamBam sighed.   
  
Yugyeom muttered something before he said, "Just continue."   
  
BamBam sighed but still went back to the conversation, "Anyway, hyung. We thought we'd let you know that the six of us are at the dorm discussing something about our Japanese album. You don't need to worry or come along! Just rest and-"   
  
Jackson cut him off, knowing the kid could go on forever. "Yeah, that's fine. What about Jinyoung?"   
  
Jinyoung, at this stage of the conversation, had an eyebrow raised sceptically as he knew that nothing like that was planned today. Jackson doubted that was actually planned too but still played along.   
  
BamBam was fumbling on his words when Yugyeom yelled, "He's on his way!"   
  
"No, I'm not," Jinyoung muttered, pulling Jackson close so he could place his head on his chest with his arms around him.   
  
Jackson smiled, just shy of a chuckle as he hung up and tossed his phone back on the table and wrapped his arms lovingly around the boy that was on him.   
  
"You know, it's kinda hurtful that they had to devise a plan just to get us to talk," Jinyoung muttered lowly, "It's like they have no faith in us when it's between us!"   
  
At this, Jackson let out the chuckle he'd been holding back. While he agreed with Jinyoung about how it seemed like the members had little trust in them with it came to their own relationship, he did appreciate their efforts in meddling. If they weren't so bad at it.   
  
"Don't laugh!" Jinyoung slapped Jackson's back and tries to pull out of his arms but Jackson tightens his arms, almost crushing the boy with his muscles.   
  
"Jackson," Jinyoung brought his arms up to push Jackson's chest off him. "Stop it."   
  
His tone was dry and he rolled eyes but his eyes had their cute little smiles hugging them. Jackson's heart almost ran out of his chest.   
  
Rather than letting them two wrestling in a hidden competition to show who's stronger, Jackson leaned forward and pecked Jinyoung's nose. Jinyoung blushed as he always did when Jackson showed his love in little ways.   
  
"Stop it!" Jinyoung repeated, pinching Jackson's neck as his hands slid to lock behind his neck.   
  
"Come on, you have to admit that their attempt is laughable." Jackson chuckled, his eyes locking with Jinyoung's.   
  
"Laughable? It's downright hilarious. Did they not think of anything better?" Jinyoung joined in with his chuckling.   
  
"The first mistake, did they not think I'd ask you why you weren't with them?"   
  
"No, the first mistake was them not thinking how I'd come and see you."   
  
"Oh please, you always come and see me first."   
  
"No, that's a lie."   
  
"Ok, so when you first brought up the meat thing with Bam- you remember? When we first started dating?"   
  
"I never forgot it." Jinyoung narrowed his eyes, not over the memory but at what Jackson was going to say next.   
  
"Of course not," A sly smile made its way onto Jackson's face. "You came over with a takeout of grilled meat."   
  
"Only to find you had already made it and was packing it up into boxes to bring to the dorm. Do you know how much money I spent on that?"   
  
"We didn't even eat anything," Jackson winked at Jinyoung.   
  
"Speak for yourself. Once you fell asleep, I had a feast."   
  
"So, you're telling me that you had meat without me?!" Jackson yelled, mocking annoyance.   
  
"Oh please, we are not going to count the number of times you ditched me for meat with Mark hyung and the maknaes." Jinyoung rolled his eyes, knowing Jackson would drop it.   
  
"You're right." Jackson dropped it and pulled Jinyoung a little closer. "Though, I can't say they were wrong in assuming you were going to come here."   
  
"Says the one who opened the door before I could even knock. How did you even know I was out there?"   
  
"Seriously, that's what you're gonna question? Not about how I know you spent all day in that café you like and that you haven't been to the gym all week and that you haven't been sleeping at all? Which is really bad, Jinyoungie. We were on such a shit schedule, those few hours would have been worth more than you know."   
  
Jinyoung blushed, his heart almost stopping as it couldn't handle going any faster. Just as he knew Jackson so well, Jackson knew him just as well. Yet, he couldn't help but make a sarcastic comment.   
  
"Says the one who hasn't been eating or sleeping properly. You know green tea doesn't count as a full meal, Sseunie."   
  
"I know," Jackson whispered, his head hiding in Jinyoung's neck. "I couldn't help but not eat. Seeing you so drained hurt."   
  
"Yeah, well. I couldn't help but worry about you so much." Jinyoung kissed the back of Jackson's neck that was showing as his hands rubbed Jackson's back. Jackson, in response, kissed Jinyoung's collarbone that was just peaking out of his jumper and tightened his leg around Jinyoung's.   
  
Jinyoung sighed. Only for the first time in a week, it wasn't heavy and it was out of love rather than stress.   
  
Jackson smiled against his collarbone and kissed it once more, biting a bit.   
  
"Jackson," Jinyoung said warningly. They still had yet to eat, they needed to actually sleep.   
  
"Do you want to have some fun?" Jackson looked up cheekily. What Jinyoung had originally thought about what Jackson was wanting was quickly thrown out.   
  
Jackson took the raised eyebrow and confused puckered lips as his answer. Jackson reached up, kissing the lips softly before declaring his plan.   
  
"Call Yugyeom."   
  
"Oh," Jinyoung's eyes lit up, catching on quick. "This is going to be fun."   
  
"Imagine the five of them are actually together," Jackson snorted, already imagining Yugyeom getting flustered and trying to avoid another death threat.   
  
"They're probably are," Jinyoung sat up, already reaching for his phone. "And, knowing them, there's alcohol."   
  
"If Youngjae was is in charge of the alcohol, they're probably already wasted." Jackson sat up, an arm around Jinyoung's waist as they both watched the phone dial, sending a call to Yugyeom.   
  
Jinyoung ran a hand through Jackson's hair as Jackson leaned on his shoulder.   
  
"Hello?" Yugyeom's voice rang out and Jackson could hear him slightly slurring.   
  
"Hey, were we meant to be discussing something about the Japanese album?" Jinyoung said, his inner actor coming out and Jackson marvelled at his abilities.   
  
"Erm," Yugyeom froze.   
  
"I thought we still had a couple of weeks before we needed to start thinking about it." Jinyoung was playing the kid like a fiddle. Jackson bit back a laugh as he watched his boyfriend gleam by teasing the maknae and he could only imagine how still Yugyeom was. Oh, how he wished he could see him in person.   
  
"Guys, he's asking about it!" Yugyeom's loud whisper responded to Jinyoung.   
  
"Oh!"   
  
"Shit shit shit."   
  
"This is your fault, Bam!"   
  
"Hey, at least we know they're talking!"   
  
"But is he even still at Jackson's apartment?"   
  
"Yeah, what if he left straight away?"   
  
"Shit."   
  
"Put it on speaker."   
  
Jackson couldn't stifle his laughter anymore. A cackle stopped any sound from Yugyeom's side.   
  
Jinyoung pinched Jackson and gave a  _ 'now you've given us away _ ' glare.   
  
"Jackson hyung?" BamBam asked through the phone.   
  
"Wait, have you two made up?" Youngjae yelled through the phone.   
  
"Oh thank fuck." Yugyeom sighed.   
  
"Language!" Both Jackson and Jinyoung said.   
  
"Shut up, you idiots," Jaebeom spoke, "Have you made up yet or do we need to bang your heads together?"   
  
"We've made up, hyung," Jinyoung answered, squeezing the back of Jackson's head slightly.   
  
"Are you guys drunk?" Jackson asked them since they all sound a bit slurred.   
  
"No," BamBam replied. "Ok well, maybe some of us are."   
  
"That means yes, we are." Mark sighed and the two boys could hear a can being opened.   
  
"Have you guys eaten yet?" Jinyoung asked.   
  
"Yeah, we ordered pizza, hyung," Yugyeom replied.   
  
"Have you guys?" Youngjae asked.   
  
"We're about to," Jackson said, looking up at Jinyoung smiling. Jackson stood up, grabbing his phone as he went to go order food while letting Jinyoung finish up the conversation.   
  
Jackson's migraine had only decreased slightly but the painkillers slowly going out of his system was starting to bring it back, badly. He went to the kitchen and shuffled around the drawer that held all types of medicines. He hadn't notice Jinyoung had walked in until the boy placed a glass of water on the countertop, right beside the pills Jackson had just taken out the packet. Jackson took the pills and finished the whole glass, all too aware of Jinyoung watching him as the boy leaned against the counter by the sink. Jackson moved to put the glass in the sink and faced Jinyoung.   
  
"You should change," Jackson said, reaching up to move a rogue strand of hair back into place on Jinyoung's head. "If you're gonna spend the night."   
  
"What do you mean  _ if _ ?" Jinyoung rolled his eyes but reached out to wrap an arm around Jackson's waist. "It's movie night and it's my choice tonight. And you are not using your migraine as an excuse to not watch my film."   
  
"I am not watching Forrest Gump again," Jackson mumbled. "It's too sad."   
  
Jinyoung laughed, his hand covering his mouth and he walked out of the kitchen to go change into more comfortable clothes. He opened the wardrobe and looked at the shelf Jackson was adamant on having for him. He shifted through the folded clothes until he found a pair of joggers and a tee shirt. He was about to borrow a pair of socks from Jackson when he heard a soft thud in the living room. Normally, Jinyoung wouldn't pay any mind to it. But knowing that Jackson hasn't been eating properly with his migraine getting worse as time went on, Jinyoung felt his heart stop. He grabbed his phone, already calling Mark as he went into the living room to confirm his worse thoughts. Jackson was lying on the floor, eyes closed and shaky breaths left him.   
  
"Jinyoung?" Mark's voice went through Jinyoung's head as he kneeled before Jackson and carefully lifted his head into his lap.   
  
"He collapsed," Jinyoung whispered.   
  
"What? What do you mean?" Mark's voice went from casual to serious so fast that Jinyoung couldn't even register Mark's calling for the others, mainly Jaebeom.   
  
"Hyung, he collapsed." Jinyoung sobbed, tears following down his cheeks faster than his pride would like to admit.   
  
"Jae, call an ambulance. Youngjae, call our manager. Yugyeom, tell Bam to stop stripping." Mark's voice barked out orders yet he didn't raise his volume at all. "Jinyoung, listen to me."   
  
"Hyung, I should have made sure he was okay. I shouldn't have waited too long to feed him." Jinyoung took a shaky breath. "The food is going to arrive any second and, and I should have just made something small. Or brought something with me. So he'd eat back then. I should have made him eat!"   
  
"Jinyoung, listen. It's Jackson's fault for not eating, for not telling us sooner. Jinyoung? Jinyoung, stop crying. Jackson needs you to be strong right now. Jinyoung?"   
  
"Yes, hyung?"   
  
"You need to answer the door when we get there."   
  
"Okay."   
  
"Jinyoung, we're, like, 10 minutes away, okay. Tell us what's happening with him."   
  
With a small deep breath, Jinyoung wiped his face hastily. His hand stroked Jackson's hair and he leaned down to listen to his breathing.   
  
"He's breathing, it's shallow and shaky. He didn't hurt himself anywhere else. He, he just dropped." Jinyoung's voice kept breaking as he held sobs in.   
  
"That's good. It's a good thing, Jinyoung." He heard Mark say in a less stressed voice.   
  
"How much longer, hyung?" Jinyoung couldn't hold himself together anymore, he was sobbing.   
  
"We're just walking in. Our manager is on the way to the hospital and- oh, the ambulance just got here too. Hang on a minute,"   
  
There was some shuffling on Mark's side and some sniffling on Jinyoung's side. Jinyoung closer his eyes and leaned down to touch foreheads with Jackson.   
  
"Please, Sseunie, please..."   
  
Jinyoung didn't need to say complete sentences, or even words, with Jackson because he just knew what the boy was struggling to say. Jackson knew Jinyoung because he loves him and Jinyoung loves him. Even as the words got caught in his throat with the sobs he hid right now.   
  
"Hey, Jinyoung." Jaebeom's voice was now speaking to him.   
  
"Hyung?"   
  
"Hey, we're gonna need you to open the door now." Jaebeom's voice is low but Jinyoung didn't realise how much he needed to hear his best friend right now.   
  
"Right." Jinyoung nodded as he gently grabbed a cushion to place Jackson's head on before making his way to the door. He hung up just as the people walked in with Mark leading the paramedics towards Jackson. Jinyoung stood still as Yugyeom and Youngjae embraced him in a warm hug. BamBam was shaking slightly but he still put an arm around the crying boy. Jinyoung reached out for the younger, knowing he was just as scared. Jackson and BamBam were too close for the younger not to be scared. Jinyoung hugged him as BamBam tried to stay strong. Yugyeom's heart swelled and he looked over at Youngjae who nodded at him, knowing exactly what Yugyeom meant. Jaebeom was on the phone, sorting something out but he still touched Jinyoung's head endearingly.   
  
The paramedics took Jackson out on a gurney and Mark took Jinyoung with him as they followed the paramedics into the ambulance and on the way to the hospital. The other four piled back into their company car and followed close behind. Jaebeom was grateful he chose not to drink that night.   
  
At the hospital, they met with their manager and were told to wait outside until the doctors were done.   
  
Jaebeom was sitting between Mark and Jinyoung, trying to comfort both of them but unsure if he was doing a good job. Youngjae was next to BamBam who hadn't left Jinyoung's side, cuddled into the older who had left his worries behind in an attempt to help the younger. Yugyeom leaned on Mark who rubbed circles into his back. Their manager was talking to everyone and none of it was important to them at that point.   
  
"Should I call his parents?" Jinyoung spoke, "I mean, they should know, right? But what if it's nothing and then they fly all this way for no reason?"   
  
"Let them know that you'll keep them updated, so then they'll know if they need to fly out," Jaebeom answered.   
  
"Namjoon hyung was asking after him, Jeongguk hyung told me that," Yugyeom said.   
  
"We'll let them know how he is in the morning," Mark sighed.   
  
Jinyoung dialled Jackson's mother from Jackson's phone that he had grabbed before leaving and BamBam tightened his hold on Jinyoung as he heard Jinyoung breathe shakily. A brief conversation was conducted between the two who were trying to not breakdown.   
  
Now, no one had anything to say. BamBam had fallen asleep in Jinyoung's lap while Yugyeom did the same in Mark's lap. Mark was leaning into Jaebeom who had his arms around his lover as he slept on his shoulder. Youngjae was curled up next BamBam, also asleep. Mark and Jinyoung stared blankly at the wall opposite them. Their manager had been called by the doctors 30 minutes ago but he hadn't returned, leaving the two awake boys to worry.   
  
"Hyung?" Jinyoung whispered.   
  
"He's gonna be alright, Jinyoung. I know it." Mark whispered back.   
  
Just then, their manager returned and looked at the two boys who had turned their heads fast enough for them to get whiplash.   
  
"He's fine," their manager starts and both boys let out a big breath they had been holding on to. "He'll be okay with a lot of rest. He fainted due to the lack of food intake and his body was overworked. He's fine, guys."   
  
Their manager smiled at them before saying that they could go see him. The two boys woke those around them with the news.   
  
Youngjae smiled so gratefully and his eyes welled up with relief.   
  
"He's okay," BamBam smiled and hugged Jinyoung once more. "I knew it."   
  
"Thank fucking God." Yugyeom breathed, his chest heaving in relief and eyes watering. None of the elders told him to mind his language.   
  
"He's such an idiot." Jaebeom shook his head but rubbed Mark's back and smiled relieved.   
  
"You guys can see him," Their manager smiled at them. "But three at a time. No more, guys."   
  
"Thank you," Jaebeom smiled at him and stood up to say bye, promising to call him tomorrow.   
  
Once he returned, the group had split into the group that'd would see him first before the other group went. Not that any of them would listen and they all knew all six of them would be squeezed into the room.   
  
Jinyoung, Mark and BamBam went first. Jaebeom, Youngjae and Yugyeom were waiting outside for 10 minutes before heading in. Jackson was on the bed with two IV drips in either arm. The monitor was beeping steadily and the IV bag stand had four bags placed there. His eyes were closed, his hair a mess, his skin pale. He had been changed into a dressing gown and his clothes were folded on a table that was beside a small couch, barely enough space for the three of them. Jinyoung moved first, heading towards the folded clothes to hold them and to subtly sniff them. They were covered in Jackson's smell and not the hospital's strong bleach that had been burning his nostrils since he walked in. Mark went to sit on the couch, silently assessing Jackson. BamBam moved to stand beside the bed, his hand hovering over Jackson's head.   
  
"Is anyone going to say anything or what?" Jackson quipped, his face smirking.   
  
"You absolute idiot, Sseunie."   
  
"Do you ever listen to anyone?"   
  
"Jackson hyung, if you weren't in a hospital bed, I'd punch you right now."   
  
"Wow, okay. Can someone who cares about me say something?"   
  
Jackson opened his eyes to see BamBam staring at him, gloss eyed. He reached out to hold the kid's hand and squeezed it, reassuringly. His eyes moved over to Mark who was sitting on the couch, biting his lip but he smiled as Jackson made eye contact with him. Jackson found Jinyoung right next to the bed, his back towards him as he faced the window, a hand holding onto the small table.   
  
"Jinyoung?" Jackson whispered and he watched the boy tense up even more.   
  
"I should message your mum." Jinyoung stuttered and then he turned to exit the room.   
  
Jackson immediately tried to sit up, causing Mark and BamBam to rush to his side to help him.   
  
"Idiot, tell us you're gonna do that first." Mark scolded him.   
  
"Jinyoung...?" Jackson looked at Mark, worry etched into his face.   
  
"He was so scared, hyung," BamBam whispered. "He wouldn't stop shaking."   
  
"He didn't even look at me now," Jackson pouted, his worry increasing.   
  
"He'll be fine, just give him a minute. It's a lot for us, imagine how much it is for him." Mark patted Jackson's head before leaving to grab the other three.   
  
"You know," BamBam thought aloud, "I think that was the longest Jinyoung hyung let me hug him."   
  
This caused Jackson to laugh, "He let you hug him?"   
  
But Jackson knew why he had let BamBam hug him for so long. An uneasy feeling settled in his stomach and he closed his eyes, head crashing further into the pillow.   
  
"What! Hyung, you said he was fine!" Youngjae yelled, walking over to Jackson and patting his face as if he was checking his temperature.   
  
"I am fine, Youngjae," Jackson spoke, lifting the hand off his face and opening his eyes again. "My head hurts, that's all."   
  
"Well, eat and sleep properly next time," Jaebeom said, looking blank but his caring tone made the scolding easier to take.   
  
"Yes, Jaebeom." Jackson winked.   
  
"It's hyung!" Jaebeom sighed, sitting on the couch that Mark had placed himself on again. "Why is it so hard for you to say hyung?"   
  
Yugyeom looked at Jackson softly, not daring to go past the end of the bed.   
  
"Yugyeom, you know you can come closer." Jackson teased.   
  
"I won't hurt you? Or move a tube out of place? Or-?"   
  
"I'm expecting you to do that. Who else is going to help me escape?" Jackson winked at the giant baby, who was more baby now than ever before with his sad emotions written on his face.   
  
"Jackson hyung, can you just not joke around? For once." Youngjae murmured, rolling his eyes from his new seat on the couch as Yugyeom slung an arm around BamBam's shoulders.   
  
"Nah, he's alright to do it." Mark chuckled.   
  
"Where's Jinyoung?" Jackson asked, knowing the younger was prolonging seeing him and he hated how he couldn't get the boy to look at him and not the hospital. He knew the younger was going out of his mind.   
  
"He's outside," Jaebeom sighed, he knew just as well as Jackson how Jinyoung struggled with hospitals.   
  
"Right," Jackson nodded, his jaw clenched and he gritted his teeth.   
  
Mark noticed this and he knew what Jackson needed.   
  
"Guys, let's head home," Mark said looking at the two youngest that hadn't left Jackson's side since being seated there. "It's been a late night for us all."   
  
"Mark hyung is right. It's like one in the morning and we're all tired. Youngjae, have you called your brother? Does he know you're spending the night with us?" Jaebeom lifted Mark up, dusting down the front of his jacket.   
  
"Yeah, he knows." Youngjae stood up   
  
"Right," BamBam nodded, "Jackson needs to rest."   
  
Yugyeom nodded, giving Jackson a soft hug where he whispered, "Jinyoung hyung is outside, I'm really worried about him."   
  
Jackson smiled and ruffled the youngest's hair, whispering back "Don't worry, I'm looking after him."   
  
Yugyeom squeezed him once more before letting go so BamBam and Youngjae could hug him bye. They told him to sleep well and to focus on getting better. BamBam added quickly with a threat. Jaebeom ruffled Jackson's head, saying bye and promising to get Jinyoung in. Mark gave Jackson a tight hug and told the idiot to not scare them like that again and to get better soon.   
  
Jackson smiled as they all left the room. He leaned back into the pillow, his body feeling heavy from the sedation yet the pain relief almost had him feeling as light as a feather. He didn't think he was going to faint at all. He was gonna get dinner with Jinyoung as the painkillers kicked it and then fall asleep on the couch so Jinyoung would have to carry him to bed. Then they would be the next day in bed with sweet kisses and soft touches. Jackson let out a deep breathe, his eyes closing and his brain running. He felt the bed dip a bit and hands covered his cheeks with fingers rubbing soft circles into the temple of his head.   
  
"Jinyoungie?"   
  
"Shush, you need to rest, stupid." Jinyoung's voice was so soft that Jackson was scared to move, thinking the boy's words will stop.   
  
"I'm sorry," Jackson said as his hands closed around Jinyoung's wrists that were under his chin. He pulled the hands cupping his face down slightly and pressed a kiss in either palm. "I really am."   
  
"Sseunie, why are you sorry? I should have made you eat sooner. Or at least let you rest.  I should have looked after you better." Jinyoung sighed, leaning down to touch foreheads.   
  
"I shouldn't have put you in a position like that. I'm a grown adult, I should look after myself. "   
  
"I guess we're both stupid," Jinyoung whispered.   
  
"So stupid," Jackson whispered back.   
  
They fell asleep not too long after that. Jinyoung had stayed next to Jackson until he had fallen asleep before settling on the couch, hugging Jackson's folded clothes to his face. They were lucky no nurses came to kick Jinyoung out. The nurses didn't come because Jaebeom had begged if Jinyoung could stay with Jackson. The nurses were also busy cooing at how cute the two were.   
  
**Three weeks later**   
  
The crowd roared. Jackson lived for these moments. When Jackson was performing, he felt powerful and he felt like he belonged perfectly on that stage. Jackson bowed and blew out some kisses dramatically. He wiped his face, trying to get rid of the slick sweat but using his sweaty hand helped very little. He walked off stage and was instantly covered with staff, wiping his face or throwing a towel over his bare back. He let them do their job as he moved towards the dressing room where the other members were.   
  
"Hyung, you were so sick, man!" BamBam cheered as he hugged the older.   
  
"Yeah!" Yugyeom chimed. "When did you learn that move?"   
  
"Guys, let him breathe." Jaebeom sighed, as he inched towards him. "You okay? Not feeling faint at all?"   
  
"I'm fine, Jaebeom hyung. I told you that was a one-off." Jackson grinned at the boy.   
  
"Right," He let the concern drip off his face but it stayed in his eyes. "Well, Mark should be back soon to check on you- he went to get food. Youngjae is performing now and then..."   
  
Jaebeom turned to look at the younger two and Jackson followed his gaze. The younger two were dabbing so violently that Jackson was more worried than amused.   
  
"What the fuck," Jaebeom breathed. "Yugyeom, stop doing that!"   
  
Yugyeom didn't stop.   
  
"Yugyeom, fucking listen to me before I lose my temper. We need to discuss your solo performance for Fine."   
  
"Hyung, you've already lost your temper." An unhelpful voice rang out from the back of the room and Jackson looked back to see the boy looking at his book, legs curled up underneath him.   
  
"I'm not gonna lose it. Breathe, Lim Jaebeom, breathe."   
  
Jackson walked away from Jaebeom, amused while the younger two had now focused their energy on Youngjae's performance. He headed towards the boy sitting on the sofa and sat next to him. The boy didn't look up at him and Jackson lifted the towel off his back.   
  
"You know," The boy clicked, holding a water bottle in front of Jackson's eyes. "I both hate and love it when you take your shirt off onstage."   
  
Jackson smiled before downing half the bottle in one go. He, then, threw his now less sweaty arms around the boy next to him and pulled him close to his chest, nuzzling his neck with his face.   
  
"Jackson, stop," The boy tried pulling away. "You're all sweaty, and I'm already in costume and, Jackson, stop it."   
  
But the boy had already leaned into the touch, turning his head slightly to let Jackson rest his head on his shoulder more comfortable.   
  
"I love you, Jinyoungie."   
  
"I love you too."   
  
"KUNPIMOOK BHUWAKUL. IF YOU DO NOT STOP DABBING, I AM GOING TO BURN THOSE THINGS YOU CALL SHOES!" Jaebeom yelled, his breathing exercise did not help at all. Mark would have to find a new way to soothe the short temper now.   
  
"They always ruin our moments, for fuck-"   
  
"Language, Jackson."   
  
They both turned to see Mark sitting next to them, a plate towered with food. Mark offered the plate to them, aware that he had surprised them but still acted like the cool guy he was.   
  
"See what I mean, Jinyoung?" Jackson whined.   
  
"Let me finish this chapter, Jackson."   
  
Mark snorted and Jackson flicked him while Jinyoung stole the last melon slice off Mark's plate.   
  
"Hey!" Mark pouted as Jinyoung took a bite.   
  
"Sorry, hyung," Jinyoung said, still not looking up from his book. So, Jackson took a bite from the melon slice and turned to chat to Mark.   


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! :)


End file.
